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Picture all the emojis on your phone: happy, sad, angry, worried, confused, bored. Which ones would you send to a friend? To a teacher? And which ones do people think you're "allowed" to send to God?
A lot of people think prayer has to be happy, calm and polite. But think about a friendship where you can only ever say "I'm fine". It wouldn't be much of a friendship. This term we've been asking "Who am I?" We've heard that God knows you completely and invites you to keep asking. Today we find out that he also wants you to be honest, and the Bible even gives you the words.
What you'll learn
- What the Psalms are, and why some of them are sad, angry or confused
- The shape of an honest prayer, using Psalm 13
- What Psalm 23 says about God in the darkest valley
What are the Psalms?
Open your Bible right in the middle and you'll probably land in Psalms. It's a collection of 150 songs and prayers. It was Israel's prayer book and songbook, and Jesus would have grown up praying it. Many psalms are headed "of David", the shepherd boy who became king.
The Psalms include lots of praise, thanks and joy. But they also include many laments: prayers that complain, cry out and ask "Why?" Laments are actually one of the most common kinds of psalm. Why would God put sad and angry prayers in the Bible? Because he wants his people to bring everything to him.
Psalm 13: cry out, ask, trust
Psalm 13 is short, just six verses. Here's how it starts:
"How long, O LORD? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me? How long must I wrestle in my soul, with sorrow in my heart each day? How long will my enemy dominate me?" (Psalm 13:1–2)
Count how many times David asks "How long?" He's not pretending to be fine! And here's the amazing thing: God doesn't tell him off. He puts this prayer in the Bible.
Psalm 13 has a shape you can remember with the word CAT:
| Part | Verses | What David does | In our words |
|---|---|---|---|
| Cry out | 1–2 | He tells God exactly how he feels. | "God, it feels like you've forgotten me." |
| Ask | 3–4 | He asks God to look at him and answer him. | "Please see me. Please do something." |
| Trust | 5–6 | He chooses to trust God's love and remembers God's goodness. | "But I will still trust you." |
"But I have trusted in Your loving devotion; my heart will rejoice in Your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, for He has been good to me." (Psalm 13:5–6)
Notice two things. First, David talks to God, not just about God. A lament is still a prayer. It's turning towards God, not away from him. Second, look at the word "But" at the start of verse 5. It's the turning point. Nothing in David's situation has obviously changed yet, but he chooses to trust God's love anyway.
Psalm 23: with me in the valley
You might know Psalm 23 already, from a funeral or a film. David had been a shepherd, so he knew exactly what a good shepherd does. In this psalm, God is the shepherd who provides food and water, leads his sheep on the right paths, stays with them in the dark, and prepares a feast for them.
"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me." (Psalm 23:4)
Psalm 23 doesn't pretend there are no dark valleys. The promise is not "you'll never go through hard times". It's that God is with his people in them.
And notice something clever. In verses 1–3, David talks about God: "he leads me", "he restores my soul". But when he reaches the dark valley in verse 4, he starts talking to God: "you are with me". Hard times can bring people closer to God.
Who God says I am
- Free to be honest with God, who stays with me in the dark (Psalm 13; Psalm 23:4).
Key words
- Psalm: a song or prayer to God.
- Lament: a prayer that cries out to God in sadness, pain or confusion.
- Shepherd: someone who looks after, feeds, leads and protects sheep.
- Valley of the shadow of death: the darkest, scariest times of life.
How this points to Jesus
Jesus called himself the good shepherd:
"I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep." (John 10:11)
Jesus also prayed honestly. On the cross he prayed the first line of Psalm 22, a lament, asking God why he had forsaken him (Matthew 27:46). Jesus knows what it's like to feel far from God, and Christians believe he went through it so his people would never be abandoned.
Think about it
Is it disrespectful to talk to God the way David does in Psalm 13:1–2?Show answer
No. David is honest, but he is still talking to God and trusting him. God put this prayer in the Bible, so he clearly welcomes honest prayers.
Why is the word "But" in Psalm 13:5 so important?Show answer
It's the turning point. David's situation hasn't changed yet, but he decides to trust God's love anyway.
Why do you think God wants us to be honest with him?Show answer
Because he wants a real relationship with us, not a polite act. He already knows how we feel, so pretending gets us nowhere.
Take it further
Try writing your own short, private prayer using the CAT shape. It can be about anything, big or small: a friendship problem, worry about your family, feeling left out, schoolwork, or something happening in the world. There are no wrong feelings to bring to God. If you're not sure about faith, you could write what you would want to say to God if you knew he was listening. Here's an example:
God, I feel like no one at this school actually wants me around. How long will it be like this? Please help me find one good friend, and help me not to give up. But I trust that you love me and that you haven't forgotten me. Amen.
If you're going through something really hard, please talk to a trusted adult too, like a parent, teacher or school counsellor. You don't have to carry it on your own.
This week, try reading one psalm each day: Psalms 4, 16, 27, 42, 46, 62 and 121. Which ones are laments? Your worksheet helps you work through Psalm 13 and Psalm 23. You could finish by praying Psalm 23 slowly, as your own prayer.